The Bare Minimum

Men, on the red carpet, are boring. That’s just the truth, and everyone knows its the truth. How many times have you seen an award show or gala or something that involves celebrities dressing up meeting at one event? In those events, galas, awards shows, etc how many times have you seen a man wear a black and white suit? I’m assuming more than you can count.


Now, how many times have you seen one or two women wear the same dresses to an award show countless times for decades? I would assume the answer would be never, but correct me if I’m wrong.

The black and white suit has been a staple of men’s fashion before Abraham LIncoin even wore it. The boring suit has been called a “classic” outfit by plenty of out of work actors for years now. Red lipstick is also a classic, but you don’t see people rub their whole bodies in red lipstick and wear that every time they see “formal attire” written on an envelope. There are plenty of options for men in the world of fashion. If you can’t figure that out for yourself, you should hire a stylist. Or better yet, avoid the red carpet altogether.

While men on the red carpet (and in real life if we’re being honest ) are boring, that wasn’t the main problem that pushed me into writing this article. The main problem was the unfair criticism that I see women get in comparison to men. For example, Alicia Keys wore no makeup on the red carpet on multiple occasions. She did exactly what a man does. She put the bare minimum amount of effort into her appearance. Yet, how many media sites called her “lazy” and in the same article call a man in black and suit, barefaced “handsome” and “stylish”?

Alicia Keys without makeup.

I’m not saying every man has to be interested in fashion. I understand that some men don’t like fashion or don’t care for it. That’s fine. Contrary to popular belief, most women aren’t too invested in fashion too. That’s fine too. The problem is why do we allow men in the public eye to get away with not being interested in fashion and showing up on the red carpet in that boring suit, but spread our criticism on women who are not up to date on the latest styles, trends, etc. I personally think if go on the red carpet (which is meant for publicity and to showcase glamourous outfits) you should step up your fashion game or skip the carpet completely.

I used to love shows like Fashion Police and I used to enjoy reading the worst dress list ten years ago. I think fashion criticism can be fun and entertaining. Fashion is a form of expression and art, self-expression and art are, in a way, meant for criticism. However, due to how much society has grown and developed over time, I think the media needs to expand its criticism to everyone. If you go on the red carpet you should pay attention to what you wear and be ready for criticism on your outfit, no matter who you are. If you can’t do that, you should ask your publicist if you can skip the red carpet for the rest of the award season. Just go straight to the show. Trust me, you’re not going to get any extra publicity wearing your 9th-grade suit again.

On the bright side of things, some aspects are improving on the red carpet. I mean it took forever, but better late than never. I’ve seen a lot of improvement over the past 3+ years. People like Cody Fern, Ezra Miller, Harry Styles, etc are very influential in men’s red carpet style. Harry Styles, in particular, has been helping boring men really jazz up their style recently.

While the number of floral suits I have seen since Harry Styles wore it in 2015 is enough to give me an allergy, at least it’s better than another ugly black and white suit. I’m trying to be ‘positive’ this year. While I am glad that a lot of men are starting to hire stylists, can we stop with the patterned suits, the colored suits, and floral suits? I’m bored, again. It’s been four years of the floral suits and three years of the colored and patterned suits. It’s 2019, can one of you grow up and get out the box once in a while? Can we do something that doesn’t involve a suit? Or something that hasn’t been done more than 20 times? Is that too much to ask? Probably. 

Actually, forget what I said. I’d rather see too many floral prints then another damn black and white suit after this article. Anyway, Here’s a tribute to the best and the worst of men’s red carpet fashion in the past year or so:

From Left to Right: Timothée Chalamet, Cody Fern, Chadwick Boseman, Ezra Miller, and Harry Styles.

From Left To Right: Chris Pine, Bradley Cooper, Sterling K. Brown, Adam Driver, and Rami Malek.

It’s up to you to decide which one is the best and worst dressed list. I think I did a really good job of hiding which group is better than another.

Truth be told, you don’t have to like fashion. I personally can’t relate but I understand not everyone can be an intellectual. I’m joking.  However, men on the red carpet do need to step up their game. Otherwise, their appearance shows no purpose. There are plenty of things to do if you don’t like fashion but need to appear on the dreaded red carpet; hire a stylist, skip the red carpet, etc. Also, the media needs to look at their Man Crush Monday’s outfits before they spread criticism to a woman minding her own business. Either we critique everyone or no one. It is 2019, we are not playing favorites to who can do the bare minimum and who can’t.


Writer. Obviously.

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